I think that there are a great many submissive men who are trapped in a vanilla marriage and simply don’t believe that they deserve to be happy (or can’t even imaging being happy and sexual). So they stay in the marriage and beat off to poorly made femdom porn. Probably have to sneak a quick peek before they have “sex” with their wife — if you can call 2 minutes of foreplay, 4 minutes of intercourse, and 2 minutes of cuddling, sex (and I used to). This post is for them.
The relationship probably started early in life. Maybe a first romance. But you saw something in her. She was kind and she was into you. Maybe you didn’t think you had value giving what you know about yourself. Maybe you tried other relationships seeking the opportunity to be the submissive one. Maybe you tried to find the “one” and failed. Maybe you lost hope that such a one existed. Maybe you settled.
You tried to submit in your way. Frequent foot rubs, back massages, morning coffee. Letting her choose what to watch. Doing things you didn’t want to do. Maybe you revealed yourself in small ways and got rebuffed or worse, misunderstood. Maybe the things you did weren’t appreciated. Maybe you continually suppressed who you were in order to “go along to get along”.
Maybe the sex sucked. Maybe you started to realize you didn’t want to have sex with her. Yet you persisted thinking that marriage is forever. Always trying to pour out your love. Not overtly, you don’t trust her enough. You can’t see her in that capacity. But you still love her as a companion. Besides, married people don’t have a sex life anyway. Maybe the porn will be enough you think. You don’t believe in unicorns so what’s the diff?
Perhaps times got worse. Perhaps the thousand tiny hurts eventually decimated you and caused you to withdraw completely. You live in a constant fog. Hating your life but, always rational, believe the grass isn’t greener. You rarely talk to her. This is life now you think. My best life is in the rear view mirror. Maybe you resent her. Maybe you give up hope. Maybe you give up dreams. Maybe you give up.
I’m here to quote Winston Churchill to you. “Never give up. Never give up. Never give up.” Choosing to leave my marriage was the most difficult thing I have ever done. Bar none. But it was the right decision—for both of us. My friend, life is short. No matter when you choose to leave you’ll still hear “you picked a fine time to leave me, Lucille.”
First, learn to accept yourself and love yourself. This is the way I’m wired — I find it very similar to sexual orientation in that I don’t view it as a “choice”. I didn’t choose to be a piss drinking submissive slut. Yet, I am. Knew I was before the age of 12. Even if I’m not drinking pee, I know I’m a piss drinking slut. And I’ve come around to love it about myself. Who cares? Fucking own that shit. Personally, I believe it takes an incredibly confident man to willingly drink his partner’s pee. Feet, ass, whips, chains, cuckolding, SPH, what ever your (legal) kink is, fucking own it king. Please your Queen. I enjoy feeling degraded, owned, and used. And? As long as she is comfortable and I am comfortable, so fucking what? And it’s sexy AF.
And ladies out there, I think you’d be surprised how many of your husbands are secret submissives. Especially if they are successful in life. If your sex life hasn’t been all that great or he doesn’t seem interested in you or interested in sex in general, you might just have a sub. Well, that, or he’s cheating on you. But I guarantee you if he’s under the age of 65 and has a penis, he is thinking about sex probably all the time (no matter what he says to you). But that’s another topic all together.
I really didn’t know where this was going to go — it’s very stream of consciousness. I guess I can sum it up succinctly by simply saying this:
Unicorns do exist.
And they are more incredible than you could ever imagine.
Unicorange